


Tumblr ficlets

by el_gilliath



Category: Roswell New Mexico (TV 2019)
Genre: Angst and Feels, Fluff and Crack, Happy Ending, Hopeful Ending, M/M, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Unhappy Ending
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-04-22
Updated: 2019-10-18
Packaged: 2020-01-24 01:52:22
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 21
Words: 15,865
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18561535
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/el_gilliath/pseuds/el_gilliath
Summary: A collection of my ficlets posted originally to tumblr





	1. Stab Me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Written for the prompt “Stab me. No, seriously. Stab me” sent to me by @sabrinachill and @ubiestcaelum who both cackled evilly. Set in the future after everything is said and done. PLP stands for Phantom Limb Pain

Alex wakes up in pain. And he knows this is going to be a bad day. Because the electric shock of pain in his leg is excruciating. The electric shock of pain in his right leg. He has way too long of a day to deal with PLP, with work first and then… he has a date. With Michael. Their first in a long time, after everything. And he wants it to go well. He needs it to go well. They’ve both tried relationships with other people, they’ve tried the friend thing (and succeeded), and now they are trying again. They’re both single, free of all obligations and shit that can bring them down. They want to see if their cosmic connection is still there, if they can build a healthy and safe relationship with one another. It’s been 15 years since their first kiss. And they need/want/hope this works. Because they are still in love with one another deep down. And that matters. Alex also knows that the alternative to this not working is Michael finishing up the console and leaving for Antar, war-torn though it might be. And he doesn’t want that at all

But getting through the day with his PLP flaring up will not be easy. And he knows that he will be exhausted at the end of the day. But Alex is nothing if not a stubborn little shit and settles for ignoring it as best as he can as he gets up, gets dressed and take some muscle relaxants to get through the day.

——————-

Of course, it works as well as he hoped it would. By 6PM, which is when Michael is supposed to come pick him up, he is in so much pain that he wants to cry. He’s tried medication. He’s tried massaging the stump. He’s tried music and imagery and repositioning the stump by propping it on a pillow. But nothing is working, and it is seriously fucking with his mind. It hasn’t been this bad in a long while, and the fact that it’s happening of today of all days… Makes him question everything. Like he’s really meant to let Michael go again. And he’s not ready for that, not even close. He needs them to try, he needs them to work. He needs…

“Alex? You in here?” The sound of Michael’s voice tears a sob from his throat. He doesn’t want Michael to see him like this, not today. But it’s inevitable. And a second later the door to the cabin bursts open and there he is. And he is the most beautiful thing Alex has ever seen, curls tamed underneath the hat, a white button-up shirt and blue (whole) jeans. He made an obvious effort and Alex is crying in pain.

“Alex! Are you hurt? What’s wrong?!?” Michael rushes over to him and takes his hand in his. And even that is too much for Alex who flinches violently as it sends another bolt of electric pain through his leg. Michael backs way at the flinch but stays within touching range.

“is it your leg? PLP?” Michael asks, and Alex just looks at him in confusion. “You told me about it about a year ago, remember? How even touch could set it off when you were in it?”

And he nods, remembering the conversation they had the last time Michael saw Alex in the throes of PLP. Michael was so attentive and wanted to know everything he could do to help. It was the beginning of Alex rediscovering his feelings for Michael, fishing them up from the deep abyss in his brain where he has hidden them in the meantime.

“Michael. It hurts and I can’t make it stop.” The raw pain in his voice is obviously not easy for Michael to hear, because he reaches his hand out to touch Alex again, stopping to curl his hand back up so he won’t.

“What have you tried?”

Alex holds in a whimper, he doesn’t want to make Michael feel worse than he seems to be feeling already. “Everything. It just won’s stop.”

“Did you, uh, try the Grey’s Anatomy trick? You know, scalpel, foot?” They might need to have words about Michael apparently watching old episodes of Grey’s anatomy, but no. He has not tried that and shakes his head.

“You want to?” Michael asks, looking over at the hunting knife laying around in Alex’s bookshelf.

“Stab me. No, seriously. Stab me.” He pleads. And Michael helps him sit up. Helps him put the prosthesis on. Helps him stand up on both feet. Knowing he is hurting him, knowing Alex is in so much pain but always so willing to try, always so willing to help him. And as Alex puts his weight on the prosthesis, he summons the knife over, takes it out of the scabbard and plunges it into Alex’s prosthetic leg.

And he looks down on his foot, at the hunting knife stabbed through it and feels nothing but relief. Proof to his brain that the limb is no longer there, that there is no point in sending pain signals to a non-existing foot. He feels the pain roll back, the electric shocks receding slowly but surely, and he exhales deeply.

“You feel better?” He looks up at Michael and smiles, exhaustion and relief and joy and… love coursing through him. He reaches out and curls his hand in Michael’s shirt, pulling him down so he can place a short but oh so sweet kiss on his lips.

“Thank you,” he whispers against Michael’s lips, smiling brighter at the answering smile he can feel on Michael’s lips.

“Gotta make sure you’re okay for our future dates Major” Michael whispers against his lips, before he draws him back into another kiss. Alex knows it won’t be easy for them. There are still issues, PTSD and trauma to deal with. But for once, he will allow himself to be hopeful. And keep holding on to that hope.


	2. Sick

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “It just keeps spreading and spreading and spreading and I can’t stop it.” prompted by ubiestcaelum
> 
> Whiskey the beagle stolen with love from christchex

“This is torture!“ 

Alex slowly turned his head to look at the curly haired fuck lying on his couch whining. He would normally call him his boyfriend, but not right now. He had been whining for two consecutive days, all because he had caught a cold. A. Regular. Fucking. Cold. And he was driving Alex crazy. He couldn’t keep still, he wouldn’t listen when Alex told him to rest, and he wouldn’t take the cold medicine that could MAYBE start making him feel better. God help him but it was hard to remember why he loved his freaky alien ass at times

“Alex! Listen to me! It just keeps spreading and spreading and spreading and I can’t stop it!“

Alex couldn’t help but snort loudly at that. Michael Guerin really was too dramatic for words at times.

“Are you laughing at me, Manes?“

“Yes, Guerin, I am. You are being as melodramatic as a 14-year old. It’s a cold, take your medicine, rest and you will be fine,“ he answered, smiling at the pout that appeared on his boyfriends lip. If it wasn’t for the cold and the whining, he would have kissed that pout right off of his lips.

“I’m not ever going to be fine again. I’m burning up!“

Alex sighed, and walked over to where Michael was lying on the couch. “Maybe you wouldn’t be if you didn’t let Whiskey lie down on top of you. You already run hot enough without a beagle heating you up.”

Michael frowned up at him, burying his hands in Whiskey’s fur who was stretched out on top of the blanket which was covering Michael, the pout becoming even more pronounced. “But she keeps me company“.

Alex sighed. “Okay. Then we’ll both be here to keep you company. But Michael?“

“Yeah, Captain?“

“Stop it with the whining“


	3. Worth it

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Conversation prompt by @christchex:
> 
> “You really think it was all about sex for me?”
> 
> “What else am I supposed to think, when your big take-me-back line was that the sex was epic?”
> 
> “Maybe, sex was all you ever let me have and I had nothing else I could use to convince you!”
> 
> “Convince me of what Guerin?”
> 
> “That we were worth it! That I was worth it!”

They’ve been having a screaming row for what feels like hours. Nothing really started it, but Alex was irritable because of a long day spent on his feet, which in turn made Michael annoyed because Alex was being so snappish. And as such an innocent comment (“Maybe you should sit down if your leg is bothering you that much, Manes”) turned into the biggest argument they have ever had. They’ve yelled about everything at this point, from high school to Kyle to Maria, even coffee preference and oil stains on t-shirts. There’s only one topic they haven’t touched thus far, and it’s them. So of course, it comes up.

“The fuck do you care about what I do anyway, Manes. You made it perfectly clear you just wanted to be friends.” The bitterness in Michael’s voice is so strong that Alex bristles even more.

“How dare you put that on me. After everything you said in the bar”

“The fuck is that supposed to mean?”

“You tell me. I thought we had something, but apparently it was all about sex with you.”

“You really think it was all about sex for me?”

“What else am I supposed to think, when your big take-me-back line was that the sex was epic?”

“Maybe, sex was all you ever let me have and I had nothing else I could use to convince you!”

“Convince me of what Guerin?”

“That we were worth it! That I was worth it!”

Alex breathes hard in the silence following that statement. The look in Michael’s face is wild, pain and regret drifting into his face as the silence lingers.

“I made you feel like you weren’t worth it?”

“Alex, just-”

“No, Michael. You didn’t think you were worth it. Out of everything I’ve done wrong in my life. That might just be the worst.”


	4. Michael

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Coda for 1x13. It's angsty, I'm telling you now. Mentions the hand and Michael not being quite fine with the scars being gone, for anyone triggered by that scene

The knowledge that he is hurting Alex doesn’t sit well with him. He knows, he knows, he knows. But his mind is filled with hurt, and anger, and pain. His mother, dying in front of him. It’s his fault, his fault, his goddamned fault. He cracked the glass, he’s the reason the biohazard alarm went off and now she’s dead. She was so close this entire time. And Noah. Noah killed him. Almost at least, so close if Max hadn’t healed him. And he didn’t consent to Max healing his hand, but here it is. Healed. But he doesn’t know how to use it anymore. It’s been 10 years; the pain isn’t going to disappear just like that. Healed or not. His reminder of the darkness in humanity isn’t there anymore. But now he has new reminders. The 50 aliens at Caulfield screaming in his head as they died. His mother and her fleeting connection out blown out like a flame. It makes him want to scream. Playing the guitar didn’t help, kissing Maria didn’t help. He’s still broken. Still in pain. And then... Max. One of them has to find their secondary power, bring him back. It’s all Isobel says, when she stops crying. When she stops raging and screaming into the sky. But none of them are in any shape or form to do it, not now. They need to deal with their trauma. Alone. Together. He doesn’t know.

Liz is in shambles and the happiest she has been at the same time. Losing what she calls the love of her life, gaining back her sister at the same time. He wants to be a friend; he wants to help her through it. But he can’t. Because she looks at him like he is her savior, like he can bring Max back. And maybe he can. But the trauma. His trauma. Is stopping him.

Seeing Alex is like seeing Jesse Manes. He knows it’s so unfair, he knows it pains Alex so much more than he deserves. But he can’t help it. It’s too painful right now. And he knows he has fucked up Alex and Maria’s friendship. He did that. To the love of his life. He took away one of the people who Alex needs in his life, who has always had his back. He made her forget her loyalty for a crush.

So he steps away. He tells Maria that Alex needs her more. That her loyalty is more important than any crush. That while he likes her, he loves Alex. So much. He tells her to take care of him because he is going to break his heart just a bit more. Maria cries, he knows she was hopeful that all of it would work out. With them, with Alex, with all of it. But she agrees. Because Maria DeLuca is her own damn savior. But she is also like him in so many ways, because she will be a savior to everyone who needs her to be. Her loyalty is her best feature, and one of the reasons he likes her so much. And she deserves more than being the easier way out.

Going back to the junkyard is one of the hardest things he has ever done. Seeing Alex sitting there looking so goddamned gorgeous he has trouble looking at him. Telling him what he has done is even harder. He doesn’t let Alex talk, he can’t. He needs to tell him, needs to come clean. Needs to start dealing. And Alex understands. He is so damn angry at him, at Maria, at his father, at the world. Michael gets it, gets it like the pain that should be gone but isn’t.

He tells Alex that one day he wants to hear everything Alex has to say to him. He wants to hear the good, the bad, and the ugly. But that telling him now would fracture him more. It will make him angry at Alex, it will make him blame the Manes men even more. Some of them deserve it. But not Alex. Alex deserves to be loved with someone’s entire heart, soul, body and mind. And right now Michael Guerin can’t be that person. He’s not ready to be anyone’s person. He can’t be, he would only destroy things more. Pulverize any good feelings someone may have for him. And he can’t bear that.

It’s not fair to anyone, the way he jerks them around. But to deal with his own damn trauma he needs to not be the Michael they think and want him to be. Playing the guitar doesn’t help, it only reminds him of the consent he did not give and his lost reminder instead of giving him quiet. So he becomes the other part of himself. He goes deep into the desert and releases the chaos inside of him. His telekinesis heightens his entropy as he blasts power around himself, rocks and sand and emotions raging the storm that is his trauma. He leaves everything else behind, only answering the nudges Isobel sends down their barely there connection to show that he is alive. He needs to do this if he is ever going to be a person that he feels is worthy of anything now that so much has changed. Not just about himself but about the world.

He vows to become stronger, to have his trauma help him in the end instead of breaking him down. He doesn’t know how long it is going to take but he needs it to work. Maybe then will he stop hurting people around him for his own gain. Maybe then can he accept things about himself that he doesn’t want to accept and accept that there are changes about himself that he didn’t want but that happened anyway.

It’s the only way he can see himself coming out of this with his psyche more or less intact. And it might be the only way he can truly move forward.


	5. Kyle the Best Bro

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “You don’t deserve his forgiveness Valenti,”
> 
> “Oh I’m sorry, you think you are in a position to talk about deserving him?”
> 
> Katie (@isakvaltersnake) posted a couple sentences during a conversation that I thought, oh yes, this is mine. So I wrote fic. Features Maria, Kyle, and Kyle being a Best Bro.

Kyle can be a pretty forgiving person. He’s done enough shit in his life that he knows the importance of forgiving someone, of someone trying to earn that forgiveness. The same way he’s doing with Alex, trying to earn back his friendship, respect and trust after completely obliterating it when he was a teen. All because he was ‘uncomfortable’ Alex being gay. Now that he is closing on 30, he can admit it; he was shit scared that Alex would fall in love with him and make everyone think he was gay. He’s deeply ashamed of it, deeply sorry. But he also knows that it made him grow as a person. Most bullies never do, but he did. And that is important.

But it also means that he can tell when someone is deserving of forgiveness. And right now, standing in the Wild Pony with Maria ranting at him over how he treated Alex in high school; she doesn’t.

"You don't deserve his forgiveness Valenti," she says, anger and annoyance on her face. And he is ready to throw down defending his boy.

"Oh I'm sorry, you think you are in a position to talk about deserving him?" he snipes back, his inner high school jock preening as she visibly recoils.

“What the hell is that supposed to mean?”

He walks towards her slowly; his need to defend the brother he chose deep. “I’m talking about Michael Guerin. I’m talking about you making a move knowing that Alex has been in love with him since high school. I’m talking about you willingly ignoring your greatest strength to go after a crush.”

“That’s not-”

“Fair? You are damn right Maria, it’s not fair. To Alex. Your best friend. I get it, catching feeling for the guy is probably easier than anything I can ever understand. But you acting on it, that’s where you fucked up. If you had talked to him about it, he would have stepped aside if you and Guerin wanted to be together, cause the only thing he wants is for the both of you to be happy.” Kyle smiles, taking a selfish joy in the way Maria is squirming and swallowing like she is deeply uncomfortable. “Instead, you started something with the one guy you should have kept away from. And he is going to fight you”

“What do you mean, fight me?”

“I mean Alex is ready and able to fight for what he wants. And he wants Guerin. You pissed him off so much that instead of him bowing out and letting you and Guerin try out this thing before it inevitably crashes and burns; he’s not giving up. ” Kyle walks even closer to Maria, pleased that she is looking decidedly guilty. She deserves to feel guilty.

“You are going to lose, Maria. Guerin loves Alex, and Alex loves Guerin. They’re cosmic. Guerin’s words, not mine,” he murmurs, low enough for it not to be overheard by anyone else in the bar, but loud enough that she hears him clearly. “One day he is going to forgive you, because we are talking about Alex Manes. But you are going to have to fight for it like I did. And I hope it is as hard for you as it was for me.”

With that he moves away, his eyes still not leaving Maria who’s looking back at him with a pain filled look in her eyes. He recognizes that look, he had the same feeling when he first apologized to Alex all those months ago. But in the corner of his eyes he sees Michael standing at the entrance of the bar, watching them carefully. He’s too far away to have had any chance of hearing them talk but the look he’s giving Kyle is as if he heard every word anyway.

And in a way he probably does, as Kyle knows Alex and Michael talked earlier in the day. He knows Alex cursed him out and told Michael exactly how betrayed he felt by both of them. He knows Alex told Michael that he understands the trauma, he understands the need for normal, he understands the need for easy. He knows Alex told Michael that he understands how his father and brothers made him feel, but that Michael was his family and not them. He knows Alex told Michael that he was done walking away, and that he would fight for what he wanted. He knows Alex wanted to kiss Michael but didn’t because he might be pissed at Maria, but he still respected her enough not too. Even if she didn’t show him the same courtesy.

“Alex isn’t giving up, Maria. You know it, he knows it. And Guerin knows it,” he says, raising his voice again just enough that he knows Michael hears him. He turns to look at him fully, and even from a distance he can see the turmoil in Michael’s eyes. And he likes it. May the best person win.


	6. Kyle the Best Bro 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompted by @christchex:  
> “He cares about you."  
> “He’s got a funny way of showing it”  
> “Yeah, because he treats everything like a war.”  
> “I wasn’t his war Valenti.”  
> “No you weren’t, but you were a casualty of it.”
> 
> This is a sequel to Kyle the Best Bro which is chapter 5.

“Hey. Can we talk?”

Kyle will admit that the one person he didn’t think would interrupt his breakfast at the Crashdown would be Michael Guerin. But here he is, boots, dusty jeans, tan sweater, black jacket and black hat. Standing next the booth Kyle is sitting in looking shifty. But then again Guerin always looks shifty. Must be that big genius brain of his that never shuts up. Kyle thinks he would be shifty too if he had to deal with that much of an overactive brain.

“What do you want, Guerin?” he asks, looking up at him while taking a sip of his lovely cup of coffee. Liz still makes the Crashdown coffee way too strong because she’s got the stomach of an ox. Kyle however prefers Mr. Ortecho’s coffee. Who thankfully was the one running the café when Kyle came in.

“Can I sit down?”

Kyle raises and eyebrow at him and gets a shrug in return. “Yeah, sure.”

Guerin sits down and removes the cowboy hat, putting it down next to him on the bench. He’s restless in a way that Kyle hasn’t seen before, a nervous energy rolling off of him. He’s different these days, quiet and sad in a way that Guerin has never seemed to be. Kyle understands though, losing his father did the same to him. Even if he didn’t turn out to be the man he thought he was.

“What can I do for you?” He asks when Guerin doesn’t open his mouth to speak. The silence isn’t uncomfortable, or unbearable. But he knows Guerin sought him out for a reason, and he does have a hospital to get too.

“What you said at the Pony the other day,” Michael starts before he goes silent again.

“What about it?”

“You were pretty harsh to Maria.”

Kyle sighs. “Yeah, I was. But she needed to hear it. She did a shitty thing, and so did you. Both of you should’ve had the common courtesy to talk to Alex about it before you did anything.”

“I know.” And isn’t that a shocker.

“You know?”

“Yeah. I might be a dumbass genius Valenti but I’m well aware of my flaws,” Guerin says, shocking him even more. He’s almost proud, that’s how shocked he is.

“Then why the fuck did you do it, Guerin? Did you want to punish him for what his family has done that bad?”

“Maybe. I don’t know.”

“He cares about you. So much. He loves you. And you’re punishing him for things out of his control,” Kyle says. A part of him wants to hurt Guerin for hurting Alex. But the alien is in so much pain it wouldn’t do much good. Just put more fuel on the fire and probably break him a part just a bit more. And Do No Harm is still what Kyle lives by.

“He’s got a funny way of showing it. All the times he walked away. One time staying doesn’t change that.”

“Yeah, because he treats everything like a war.”

“I wasn’t his war Valenti.” Michael says, looking down. And suddenly it dawns on Kyle just how fucking stupid the two of them are. Because even if they have been speaking, they haven’t actually talked.

“No you weren’t, but you were a casualty of it.”

Michael looks up, with a look of pained surprise on his face. “What?”

“You know what he told me? The first time we talked again after he came back? He told me that his father was his war. That his father hated him. Him finding you together in that shed, blackmailing Alex into joining the Air Force. You were a casualty of a war he fights every day,” Kyle says, his voice low.

“What do you mean, blackmail.” It’s Kyle’s turn to be surprised. He thought Alex at least told him that.

“Jesse Manes threatened him by saying that if he didn’t, he would hurt you worse than he already had.” He answers, and watches as Guerin shuts down completely. The fidgeting and shiftiness disappear in the blink of an eye, and any mask that might have been on his face is gone. Behind it sits a broken man, someone with so much pain and trauma that even Kyle would hug him if asked. The pain on Guerin’s face is almost unbearable to watch. But he put it there so watch he will.

“Jesse Manes has ruined more lives than yours, probably more lives than we will ever know. But none more than Alex. He has had to live with that monster since the day he was born. The first time he was beaten by his father he was 5. He’s had everything he ever loved systematically taken away from him and destroyed by his own father. Your pain matters Guerin, it’s valid and you should feel like it is,” Kyle takes a deep breath, he knows what he’s going to say next will break Guerin a bit more but he has to. For Alex. “You blaming Alex for anything his father does isn’t any different than Alex already does. He'd give his life if it would fix the things his father has done. He would take bullets for it and lose another leg for it. He would burn in that prison if he had to.”

“Valenti.”

“He loves you, Guerin. Maybe it’s time you figure out if you could love him knowing what you know now”

“I thought you said he would fight for me”

“Oh he will. But there needs to be something to fight for. Is it?” He doesn’t actually need Michael to answer, he knows what the answer is. Alex Manes wouldn’t be fighting for something if there was no hope. He’s a stubborn little shit, but he’s not that stubborn. He’s still glad when Guerin meets his eyes and gives a tiny shrug in what he knows is angry cowboy speak for yes.

“Okay. Good luck. And Guerin? Jesse Manes is currently in a medically induced coma at the hospital. You’re welcome”. He takes far too much pleasure in the wide eyes gives him as he gets up and walks out of the Crashdown. He did always enjoy getting the last word.


	7. Handprint

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> So @saadiestuff said: So you know how Max marks Liz with the handprint while they're having sex and they kind of imply it gets her off... I feel like this is something we writers should keep in mind for hiatus Malex fics.
> 
> And so came handprint porn. With feels. Because boys.

“Hey, uh. Liz told me something.” Michael looks over at Alex, wondering at the nervous tone. Alex is almost never nervous. Fierce yes, unsure at times yes. But rarely nervous.

“Oh yeah?”

“Yeah. You know the handprint you leave when you use your powers?” Michael nods so Alex can continue. “Apparently if you do it during sex it’s supposed to be pretty… hot.”

To say that Michael is shocked would be an understatement. Their sex life is no slouch, he has used the word epic to describe it and he will use the word epic again if he needs too. But Alex is usually very careful to not bring up any alien stuff when it comes to sex. The trauma triggers both of them have is enough for a whole planet, and both of them are not in any mood to bring that into their bedroom. And how cool is that, their bedroom. Who would’ve thought.

“Are you telling me that my brother and Liz use a psychic connection through the handprint when they have sex?”

“Yes.”

“Huh, good for them. And you’re asking me this why?”

Alex swallows hard. “You know why.”

“Alex.” Michael can’t help but grin at how his boyfriend is slowly turning red. “Would you like to have psychic bond sex with me?”

“I, uh. You told me we were cosmic. I want to see it” Alex replies, his eyes down towards the floor. He slowly raises them to look into Michael’s eyes, and the warmth in them is something that always takes Michael back to when they were 17. When they were young, and happy, and so in love. They’re not any less in love now, no less happy. But they are more broken, older, maybe even wiser. A request like this is rarely a simple request.

“You want to see our connection like I do don’t you? Feel what I feel for you?” Michael asks, slowly walking towards Alex. His… unique situation has allowed Michael to see their connection more clearly, ever since the first time he put his handprint on Alex when he healed him after Jesse shot him. Though the handprint and connection had faded for Alex after about a week, it had stayed in the back of Michael’s head, lingering like a lover’s soft touch. It had made everything else more difficult than he could imagine, his tentative dating with Maria almost an impossibility. But it had also helped with his trauma, helped with knowing he was loved. And when he and Alex found their way back to each other eventually… it had been the best thing he could imagine.

“I remember the feeling from when you healed me. But I haven’t felt it since we got back together, and I want too.”

Michael just smiled as he stopped in front of Alex and put his hands on his cheeks. “Darlin’, you only had to ask.”

Kissing Alex was always like coming home, like the glorious feeling when he solved a complex equation that had been bothering him, like reverse engineering something from just a picture and the parts. Kissing him with the connection in his head was more. More tender, more loving, more breathtaking. He understood why Alex wanted to feel it, and he would gladly show him.

“Come on, let’s go to bed,” he whispered against his lips, stealing another soft kiss and getting a small moan in return before he pulled Alex into the bedroom with him and pushed him down onto the bed. Thankfully the day had been warm, so they were both just wearing pants, which Michael got off of them in no time. The prosthesis came off next, as lovingly as he could manage. While Alex was wearing a prosthesis built by him now that caused little to no pain, he still wanted to be careful. Jesse Manes ripping the prosthesis off his son was another thing that happened, and a trigger they avoided by all means.

“Michael, come on. I’m fine,” Alex said breathlessly from the bed and Michael couldn’t help but lie down half on top of him and pull him back into sweet kisses that quickly turned hot and dirty.

“You sure about this?” Michael asked as he pulled away and put his left hand over Alex’s heart. The connection would always be strongest if put there, and as Alex nodded he pushed down with his power. The connection in Michael surged out of him, easily finding the connecting line in Alex. The bond that had once tied them together and now would again.

The reaction is instant, the fleeting feelings of Alex in the back of his head blooming into full blown senses. Love, lust, want and need battling each other as they rose to the forefront of Michael’s mind, Alex’s systematic thoughts and memories rising to meet his halfway. The kiss at the museum springing forward as a beloved memory, their first time in the toolshed working to bring their need for one another even more forward. All of the other kisses, all of the other times, all the love battling for attention for just a moment before everything turned clear. And the only thing left was the pure, cosmic connection they had.

Alex moaned underneath him, a breathlessness in him that Michael had rarely seen but loved. His lust pulling Michael under as he pulled him down into a kiss. Sloppy, deep kisses filled with want coursing his brain and in his heart. Feeling Alex had always turned him on, but Alex also feeling him was a new thing. The need and want to come with the connection in their head threatening to drown him, Alex’s lust the same.

But with a mighty yank of willpower he pulled them both away from the edge. If they were doing this they were doing it properly.

“Alex, focus. Come on baby, hold on for me,” he whispered filthily in Alex’s ears, scraping his teeth over his earlobe and soothing it with his tongue. Alex only whines beneath him, lost in the feelings of the bond between them. So he pushes, drags the lust, want, need through the bond, almost like he’s dragging his hands over Alex’s. Alex pushes up against it and opens his eyes to look at Michael. His pupils are almost completely covering his irises but he’s lucent enough to take hold of Michael’s other hand and pull it down towards his entrance.

“You are such a naughty man, Alex,” Michael more or less growled in his ear as he pushed his finger inside Alex. He had obviously planned this, as he was already stretched and lubed up.

“Michael, please.” The breathless plea coming out of Alex is more than he could handle. He can feel his control slowly slipping away from him and knows he needs to be in Alex, now. He wastes no time in finding a condom and putting it on himself one handed.

“Alex, lift your hips for me a bit. Come on darlin’, I want to be in you right now” he says, and Alex complies with a hitched breath, tilting his hips just enough for Michael to get a pillow underneath. After he wastes no time lining himself up and pushing in with one long, slow move. The connection soars between them even more as he does, and he can feel how it is to be inside Alex as well as feel how it is to have Michael inside of him. The bond creates a reverb of emotions, of sounds, feelings and thoughts, vibration through them like someone plucking at a guitar string. The lust, want, need is no longer his, it’s theirs. Joined so completely at the seams of a cosmic connection. Michael can feel Alex in his head, as he can feel himself in Alex. The love between them melting into one as Michael moves within Alex. Alex is too far gone at this point, one of his hands clasping Michael’s against his chest, the other dragging his nails down Michael’s back, his good leg curled around Michael’s hips as he tries to move with him.

But Michael is back in complete control. This is his power, his existence. The cosmic bond between them growing as Michael pushes more and more into it, his hips driving his dick deeper into Alex at each trust. He angles himself just right, and revels in the shout Alex gives him as he hits his prostate dead on. This is his domain; this is what he is good at. But he can only keep it for so long as Alex’s growing ecstasy reverbs in his mind. He’s losing it to the pleasure in his body, to the lust in his head, to the love in his heart. And with one last thrust inside of Alex he lets it all go; he opens the connection completely. And the stars reply back.

He sees himself through Alex’s eyes, sees the love that has not waned since they were 17, sees the fear he used to have melt away in the force of their connection. He let’s Alex see himself through his eyes, lets him see how his love has helped him in so many ways, lets him see the happiness and completely joy when they finally kissed each other again. And just like that his orgasm is ripped out of him, pleasure thrumming through every part of his body. Beneath him Alex reacts in the same way, screaming into the open space of their bond. It takes them over, their pleasure crashing together until it’s all Michael can do to hold on and not pass out. It races through him, through Alex, through the both of them and opens what feels like every cell in his body. It’s the greatest thing he has ever felt

He opens his eyes a few moments, minutes, hours later to find Alex looking at him. The love in his eyes is the strongest he has ever seen, made stronger by the fact that he can feel the love in his head, clear as day.

“How did it feel?” he asks, pulling out and getting rid of the condom before he gathers Alex back in his arms. Alex is trembling, so he pulls the sheets over them with an easy flick of his powers as he waits for Alex to respond. Alex just looks at him for a long time before a smile appears on his face.

“It was perfect.”


	8. Feet

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Written for the prompt “Quit touching me, your feet are cold!” by allthehearteyes

“Quit touching me, your feet are cold!”

Alex can only look at his whiny boyfriend pouting at him from the other end of the couch. Michael has been increasingly bratty these last couple of days. Partly because he’s overtired from working on some sort of project with Liz, partly because he’s been working extra at the junkyard to make up for it, and partly because Alex has been busy getting his delectable ass honorably discharged from the Air Force. He’s aware that Michael doesn’t deal well with being ignored because it makes him feel rejected. But this is just hilarious.

“Michael,“ he says with as much as a serious face and voice he can muster right now. “Are you pouting at me because I happened to touch you with my fake food?“

Michael’s eyes widen at the implication and Alex can se him gearing up for an apology. Which makes him snort. Loudly.

Michael narrows his eyes at him, the pout becoming even more pronounced and Alex can’t help but grin at him as he scoots over and takes Michael’s beautiful face between his hands.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to touch you with the cold metal. Can you forgive me?“ He asks, the grin on his face becoming bigger as Michael flushes.

“Sorry, I’m being bratty aren’t I?“

Alex shakes his head. “You’re tired, overworked and feeling ignored. You’re being a little drama queen but it’s okay.”

Michael huffs out a laugh as he loses the pout and leans his forehead against Alex’s. “I love you”

Alex’s grin turns into a genuine and loving smile as he kisses Michael quickly before leaning their foreheads together again. “I love you too”


	9. Blushing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: “Is there a reason you’re blushing like that?” by allthehearteyes

They haven’t been back together long. They’re not really back together at all. But they’re working on getting back together. Working on themselves, on their collective lives. Working on being an us, a we. It’s a bit harder than they anticipated with all the shit they have behind them and in between them. But both of them want it. Max and Liz wants it. Isobel, Kyle and Jenna wants it. Even Maria is tired of them and wants them to be an us at this point. And that says something about how tired everyone is of their shit.

They’ve been dancing around each other for months now. Slept together a couple of times when they had a bit too much to drink. Gone on a few ‘dates’. Seen some movies and been on a few roadtrips with Whiskey and Wentz yapping in the back of the car. Stolen kisses in the museum again (because why not).

But this? This is too much for Michael to bear. He’s an alien, he naturally runs hot. But he’s about to combust right now.

“Is there a reason you’re blushing like that?” Alex asks, giving him an amused look from where he’s standing in front of a mirror. Adjusting his fucking Dress Blues. 

“Honestly? I’m having a hard time breathing with how good you look in that thing.“

Alex snorts at him. “It’s just a uniform Michael, it doesn’t look that good.”

“Maybe not to you cause you see them all the time. But I think you look fucking hot darlin’. And I might be picturing myself ripping the damn thing off you and having my way with you,“ Michael replies, cocking his head to the right just to take a better look of Alex’s ass in the dress pants.

“If you behave and don’t fuck up my honorable discharge tonight, I might let you.“

“You got it, Captain,“ he replies, smiling all the much wider as Alex laughs loudly, a laughter filled with love. They’re going to be just fine.


	10. Jealous

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: “OH you’re jealous!” by all the hearteyes
> 
> But also for my personal headcanon of Jenna Cameron can peg anyone

“Why the fuck was Valenti here?“

Alex turns bewildered to look at Michael, who’s fuming at the cabin door. “Because he’s my friend?”

“He treated you like shit, how the hell is he your friend?“ Michael asks with a scoff in his voice. He’s frowning now, a surly look on his face.

“I know. We got over that, remember?“ Alex asks right back, still confused as to why Michael is being a bit pissy.

“I don’t like it.“ And suddenly it dawns on him why Michael is acting the way he is.

“OH you’re jealous!” he exclaims. He also knows he shouldn’t find it cute, but Michael having anything to fear from Kyle Valenti of all people is silly. “You do realize Kyle is straight, right?“

“So what? Sexuality is an outdated concept anyway.“

Alex laughs softly and walks over to Michael, looking him in the eyes. “First of all, sexuality might be an outdated concept but it still exists. Second of all, I’m here with you, the love of my life.” And at that Michael starts to smile so he leans in to give him a soft kiss.

“And third of all, Kyle is dating Jenna Cameron. If he wanted to get fucked, he has someone perfectly capable of pegging him right there.“

The look of shock on Michael’s face is something that will never get him to stop laughing when he thinks back on it.


	11. Hoodie

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt by allthehearteyes: 
> 
> “Have you seen my hoodie?” 
> 
> “Nooo.” 
> 
> “You’re wearing it, aren’t you?”

Ever since Alex went to basic training he’s had one slightly oversized Air Force hoodie that he loves above all others. He calls it his emotional support hoodie by this point and has worn it whenever he needs to forget the world a bit and let his head take a break. It’s also the hoodie he wears when he just wants to snuggle up in comfortable clothing and not wear his prosthetic at home.

So when he can’t find it a lovely, if slightly chilly Monday morning, he panics slightly. But he knows he had it Friday night so it can’t be far gone. Still, the though of him not finding is makes him twitchy. So he calls the last person to see the hoodie besides him.

“You know I only left two hours ago.“

Alex snorts into the phone. “I know. Don’t worry, I’m not missing you yet“

“Seriously Manes, that’s hurtful. My heart is breaking over here,“ Michael says, mock hurt in his voice.

“No it’s not. But I’m actually calling for a reason and not just to flirt. Have you seen my hoodie?“

“Which hoodie?“ Michael asks.

“The Air Force one. You know, the soft one I usually wear?“ Alex says back, and the complete silence in on the other end of the phone is suddenly very suspicious.

“Nooo.”

“You’re wearing it, aren’t you?”

Michael sighs. “Will you believe me if I say no?”

“You know I won’t,“ he says with a smile on his face. Michael knows the attachment he has to that hoodie, he won’t ruin it.

“Fine. I’m wearing it. It smelled like you.“

“Now who’s missing who?“ Alex asks, not able to resist the urge to tease a little.

“Yeah, yeah. I’m a sap, give it a rest.“

“You better bring it, and yourself, back in one piece Guerin“

“I will sweetheart, I will.“ Michael answers, happiness evident in his voice.


	12. Kyle the Best Bro 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “I hear you’ve been going around defending my honor.”
> 
> Those are not the first words Kyle expects to hear when he walks into the Shepherd bunker, but he shouldn’t be surprised. Alex is nothing if unpredictable at times.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had some requests for a third part of Kyle the best bro, so here it is

“I hear you’ve been going around defending my honor.”

Those are not the first words Kyle expects to hear when he walks into the Shepherd bunker, but he shouldn’t be surprised. Alex is nothing if unpredictable at times.

“Not that I don’t appreciate it Kyle, but you know I can fight my own battles.”

“But you shouldn’t have to,” he replies, because yeah, Kyle knows. He knows Alex can fight his own battles better than anyone, he lost a leg for fighting his own battle. Doesn’t mean he won’t stand up for him if need be though.

“Maria called me.” And that is not what Kyle expected either. “She told me what you said. And as much as I am grateful, she didn’t deserve that.”

“I know I was way too harsh, but she needed to hear it. Were you gonna tell her?”

“That’s not the point Kyle.”

“Yes it is. Because you want Guerin, and I know you’re gonna fight for that. Even Guerin wants you to fight for it. ” Kyle says, looking at the small but oh so sad smile on Alex’s face. “I just don’t want you to give up on something because you think you’re not good enough.”

“I’m not. I’m stepping back to let Michael do what he needs to heal.”

“With your best friend?” And that makes Alex look over at him.

“My childhood best friend it right here. I forgave you for being a piece shit all through high school, I can forgive Maria for this too,” he replies, a steely determination in his eyes. “Michael loves me. I know it, Michael knows it and I’m pretty sure Maria knows it too. Let them have easy while they can.”

Kyle exhales loudly, clenching his teeth as he nods at Alex. But he takes in what Alex is wearing, jeans that fits perfectly, a shirt that shows off his arms and the softest looking leather jacket hanging over the chair he’s sitting in.

“So the style change?” He asks, raising an eyebrow as Alex smiles in a way that’s a lot less sad and a little bit mischievous.

“If I play a little bit unfair then no one has to know.”

Kyle snorts, nodding his head at the man he is absolutely determined to get back as his best friend again. “I’m your best bro, I’m not gonna say anything”.

The laugh coming out of Alex’s mouth makes him grin. And if Guerin stumbling a bit as he takes in Alex’s new look when he arrives to go over data from Caulfield makes him grin even more, that’s okay too.


	13. Lockscreen

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt by allthehearteyes:
> 
> “Am I your lockscreen?” 
> 
> “You weren’t supposed to see that.”

Alex doesn’t like people touching his phone. It’s a rule of the universe, same as Michael not letting anyone (besides Alex) wear his cowboy hat, Isobel not letting anyone into her closet if she’s not there, Liz yelling at you in Spanish if you touch her coffee and Maria will cut you if you mess up her liquor line at the Pony. It’s something they all know, and something they all respect because quirks are part of what makes you, you.

But Alex and his phone is not just a quirk, it’s a fact. If you touch his phone without his explicit permission you will be treated to the cold fury of Captain Manes. And fine, it is his military phone as well as his personal so the ‘Safety of the Nation’ might be at stake. Michael doubts it, but he still stays away from Alex’s phone.

But Alex is never on his phone unless he’s completely alone either. All the rest of them might check a message or facebook if they’re around one another from time to time. But not Alex. If he’s around the rest of them his phone stays in his pocket. Even if it’s only Alex and him in the cabin the phone stays firmly in his pocket or a drawer in the bedroom.

So when Alex leaves his iPhone on the kitchen counter. Well. Michael is never going to have an opportunity like this again. He creeps from the living room to the kitchen as Alex is looking in the fridge, quietly pockets the phone and all but runs back to the living room. He knows what code Alex uses for everything else and hopes it’s the right one so he tries to unlock it. And when he does, because Alex still uses Michael's 'birthday' everything, he can only stare at it.

“Michael! Did you take my ph- Oh.“

Michael looks up at him. “Am I your lockscreen?”

“You weren’t supposed to see that.“

“Alex Manes, are you telling me that the reason you hide away your phone at all times is because you didn’t want me to see that I’m on the background of it?“ And he is, a picture of him that was taken at the Pony during Open Mic night. Alex was on stage, and angle as well as serious heart eyes Michael is sending the stage tells him Maria took it.

“Shut up, it’s no one’s business.“

Michael gets up and locks the phone, giving it back to one extremely blushing Alex. “No one’s business but mine. But you gotta admit darlin’, it’s damn cute.“

“You’re sleeping on the couch.“ Alex says into his ear as he hides his red face in the crook of Michael’s neck. 

Michael just chuckles and gathers him close in his arms. “I can live with that.”


	14. Stop Seeing each other - Mylex

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alex can hear them arguing as soon as he opens the car door, Kyle’s smoothly angry tones mixing with Michael’s gruffly annoyed voice at a noise level he’s sort of impressed by. But he also knows that if his boyfriends (and how whacky isn’t that) are arguing with this level of noise and intensity, it’s not a good one, nor one that will blow over quickly. He strains to hear what they’re arguing about as he walks closer to the cabin but as he can’t he figures he just has to go inside.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Prompt by supernaturalisreal
> 
> “I think we should stop seeing each other.” prompt for mylex, like michael and kyle had a fight, and when alex arrives at home just at the end of the discussion, discovers that Michaek is going to spend a few days in his trailer. When he learns the reason for the fight between them, he just rolls his eyes and smiles thinking that this fight would come to an end in less than twenty-four hours. And the other day, he realized that he was right.

Alex can hear them arguing as soon as he opens the car door, Kyle’s smoothly angry tones mixing with Michael’s gruffly annoyed voice at a noise level he’s sort of impressed by. But he also knows that if his boyfriends (and how whacky isn’t that) are arguing with this level of noise and intensity, it’s not a good one, nor one that will blow over quickly. He strains to hear what they’re arguing about as he walks closer to the cabin but as he can’t he figures he just has to go inside.

The level of anger in the main room of the cabin is truly impressive, he can feel it in his bones how angry they both are. Nothing is flying though, so he’s safe in the knowledge that Michael isn’t pissed enough his powers are reacting. Michael would never hurt them, but he has seen him pissed enough to make things hover.

“What that fuck is that supposed to mean, Valenti?”

“You’re being an ass, Guerin!”

“All I said was that you and Alex have been spending a lot of time together without me!”

“Yeah? And? What are you insinuating?”

“Nothing! Christ, Kyle. It was an observation.” Alex can already see where this is going, and it’s not anywhere good.

“Well, it sounded like it was a fucking accusation.”

“Oh yeah, what would I be accusing you of, huh? Trying to push me out of this?”

“Maybe! You’re insecure enough for it!”

There is one thing one learns early when dating Michael Guerin; you do not talk about him thinking that he’s unlovable, anything bad about Max and Isobel, talk down on his science stuff, or him being insecure. Alex knows this, he knows Kyle knows this and he knows Kyle just made a big mistake. Kyle doesn’t seem to have recognized this just yet, but Michael goes rigid. His entire body freezes in between one breath and another and he turns stone cold. All traces of emotion vanishes from his face which is when Kyle finally realizes what he just said.

“Mich-”

**“I think we should stop seeing each other.”**

It’s obvious Kyle wasn’t expecting that. Truth be told, neither was Alex but he’s not surprised.

“Just because I called you insecure you want to stop seeing me?” The hurt is evident in Kyle’s voice, but Michael doesn’t react.

“No. I think I should stop seeing both of you.”

“What?” Even Alex is starting to feel hurt now.

“I made one comment about how the two of you have been spending a lot of time without me, and you blew up in my face. Obviously there’s something going on, and maybe it would just be best if I let you two be together.”

“Michael!”

“I’m not made for this anyway. Now it will be easier for you.” And with that Michael backs out of the door, leaving Kyle and Alex alone in the cabin. They hear his truck start less than a minute later and drive away. It’s not the first time one of them has driven away in a huff, but it is the first time one of them has tried to call it quits between them.

“Kyle, what the hell just happened?”

“I- I don’t know? He made a comment about how you and me were together without him and I panicked?”

“Panicked? Kyle, that wasn’t panic.”

Kyle exhales loudly. “I know. I just didn’t want him to find out.”

“Why didn't you just tell him we’re planning a secret? He literally broke up with both of us because you panicked and snapped at him.” The thing is, Alex isn’t trying to make Kyle feel worse. But sometimes their combined bucketloads of issues means eggshells. Not trampling through the henhouse. “You know how he feels about being called insecure.”

“I **know** ,” Kyle says as he buries his fingers in his hair. “I fucked up.”

Alex rolls his eyes up towards the ceiling. He knows he can fix this, he knows Michael and Kyle can fix this. But he also knows how stubborn Michael can be, and that he will need a couple of days to calm down. 

“You should go to the airstream.” Kyle obviously knows as well. “You staying here with me will just make him think even more that he’s right.”

“You sure?”

“Yeah. I’ll let you fix my mistakes for me. And then I can grovel,” Kyle says, a small smile on his face. Alex just huffs in response and walks over to give him a deep kiss. 

“Go get our man back, Alex.”

“I’ll try. I’ll text you tomorrow.”

Kyle just nods as Alex walks out of the cabin and gets into the car. Alex knows that Kyle won’t stay there without them, he’ll probably head to the apartment next to the hospital he has for when he works doubles and doesn’t want to drive home before he’s gotten some sleep. He doesn’t want Kyle to be alone but right now he needs to be with Michael, and hopefully get their man back. 

The drive to the Airstream still makes him nervous. He doesn’t know what he’s going to find when he gets to the Airstream, if Michael is even there, but he knows he has to try. Not just for himself, but for Kyle too. What they have is… _good_. It’s tender, sweet, loving, but also angry, fiery and **hot**. They come together with a passion that Alex has never felt before, the only thing that came close was what he had with Michael before all this. But adding Kyle to the mix has settled them, settled _him_ , in ways he didn’t know he could be. In ways he didn’t know he wanted to be settled.

But his boyfriends are just that, they make him feel safe, protected. Wanted. He doesn’t want to lose that, he doesn’t want to lose either of them. He also knows how stubborn Michael can be, if he’s made his mind up this might not be easy. He’s is still going to try.

He gets to the junkyard to find Michael sitting in a lawn chair in front of the fire pit. He already has a bottle of whiskey in his hands, thankfully no acetone yet. Good. That means he still has time to convince him. 

“The fuck are you doing here?” Michael asks as soon as he gets out of the car. His voice is void of emotion, which tells Alex more about how Michael is feeling than if it was filled with anger.

“I came to see you.”

“Now why would you do that, when you could be with Doctor McDreamy?”

“Because I’m lucky enough to have two boyfriends. Doctor McDreamy might be one of them, but you should see Cowboy McGorgeous. He has the softest, most amazing curls, and the prettiest hazel eyes I have ever seen. But it’s his disposition is what I love most about him.”

“Alex-”

“You see, Cowboy McGorgeous is just so unbelievably kind. He takes care of everyone, makes everyone feel like they mean something. He always makes sure to have food ready when Doctor McDreamy gets home from the hospital, he can tell with just a look when one of us needs a hug or a kiss, and he always, **always** makes sure that we know we are loved.”

“Then why the fuck have you been avoiding me? And why the fuck did Kyle blow up in my face when I asked him about it today?”

And there it is. The telltale annoyance that means that even if Michael doesn’t want to, he is listening. He’s hurt, heart broken and so very, very unsure, but he is listening. “Because we’re planning a surprise party on saturday. And we were going to ask you if you wanted to move in with us.”

“No,” Michael says, eyes narrowing. “The fuck you were.”

Alex just keeps silent. He needs to see where this is going before he does anything else. 

“You’re the golden couple, I’m just the tag along you use to have fun. The fuck if I’m gonna move in with you.” The fact that Michael just called himself the tag along in their relationship makes Alex’s blood boil, but he knows Michael isn’t finished yet. “The fact that you think I’m more than just your extra on the side is delusional. I’m just the thing in your bed that you can screw when you’re tired of each other.”

“The thing in our bed that we can screw when we’re tired of each other?” Alex asks incredulously. 

“That’s what I fucking said, and you **know** it. You two are the perfect couple, I was just lucky to be included.” The annoyance turns into pain, bright and horrible and ugly, on Michael’s face before they start to melt away into the Guerin patented Face of No Emotion. He’s making up his mind, and it’s not a good one

“You were not _included_. Nothing about you is an _inclusion_. You were the start of this, or have you forgotten that? You and me were the couple, _we_ decided to pursue Kyle. _Together_.”

“Yeah, because you wanted him!”

“Are you trying to tell me you never wanted Kyle?”

Michael sighs. The Face is fully in place now. “Yes. Now go back to your boyfriend, and leave me alone.”

Alex closes his eyes and swallows noisily. “If I go back to the cabin I’ll be alone, Kyle went to his apartment. We don’t want to be without you, Michael, we don’t want to be a _we_ if you’re not there. I promised you I wouldn’t look away, that I wouldn’t walk away again. Please don’t make me.”

The space between them is silent after that, oppressive and mean and filled with something Alex doesn’t want it to be filled with. But he hears the rustle of a chair and opens his eyes to see that Michael has gotten up.

“Then I’ll do it for you. Goodbye, Alex.” And then Michael turns around and walks into the Airstream, the door closing and the lock turning into place.

\--------------

Alex still stays outside the Airstream. He can’t move much besides sitting his ass down in a lawn chair, and text Kyle that he failed. Kyle only texts him back ‘I’m sorry’ which just makes him feel worse. Yes, Kyle might be slightly to blame but something has been missing in the communication between Michael and him, something he didn’t even know _was_ missing, if Michael thinks he’s just a bit on the side. Here he is, thinking that Michael knows just how integral he is to this relationship of theirs, just how loved and wanted and needed he is. Instead… Instead Michael thinks he means nothing.

He’s contemplating what to do when the door to the Airstream suddenly bangs open, and Michael more or less falls out of it. He looks rough, drunk and red-eyed as if he’s been crying, curls a mess as if he’s been tugging them. He has a new bottle of whiskey in his hand, but still no acetone. He dumps himself down into a lawn chair across from Alex, but doesn’t acknowledge him in any way. Alex is a bit unsure if Michael even know he's there at the moment. 

“I just don’t get why you haven’t left me behind months ago. You finally got Kyle, why are you keeping me around?” Well, at least Michael knows he’s still there.

“Do you really believe that?”

Michael looks at him, his eyes swimming in their sockets because of how drunk and unfocused they are. “Have you given me reason not to?”

“I thought I had,” Alex replies. “I thought you knew how much I want you, how much we both want you. How much we both _love_ you.”

“I know you want me, I’m great in bed,” Michael said with a leer. “But you love each other. ‘M fine with that, I don’t need you to love me. ‘S fine if you want to be with just Kyle, I’ll let you go so you can be happy.”

“I don’t want you to **let me go**. Don’t you fucking **dare** , Michael. We’re cosmic, star-crossed, whatever the fuck you want to call it. I’m not giving up on you, on this. **On us**.” Alex could feel anger and desperation take over inside of him, too much had happened for him to give up on Michael now. It swam within him, rising among the fear of losing the greatest thing he had in his life, the two most wonderful men he had hoped to live out the rest of his life with. For richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health. “Michael. Do you really feel nothing for Kyle?”

Michael leaned his head back slightly, his fingers dropping the whiskey bottle onto the ground next to the chair, the bottle tipping over and spilling whiskey into the sand. Alex can’t bring himself to care about the alcohol being spilt, even if he knows Michael would think of it as a waste of money.

“No, ‘course I feel something,” he mumbled out, his eyes swimming even more, Alex could see him struggle to focus.

“Then let us prove that we love you, that we want you with us. _Please_. I don’t want to lose you, again.”

Michael is obviously on his last leg of being awake, if the way he keeps shifting is any indication. 

“Maybe you should go to bed.”

“‘Kay.”

“Come on, I’ll help you in.”

“No,” Michael says, his eyes opening wide for a second, a second of clarity entering his gaze.. “You can prove it. To-Tomorrow.”

“You sure?”

“Mmm. Make me let you. Both of you. Now t’ke me to bed.”

“Okay, come on then,” Alex says, getting up and wrangling Michael out of the chair. He wrangles him into the Airstream, onto the bed and out of his clothes. He wrangles him under the covers, wrangles Michael’s octopus like arms off of him, wrangles his own clothes and prosthesis off, and gets into bed. Where Michael’s octopus like behavior wrangles Alex back into his arms. He doesn’t know if Michael will regret him being there when he wakes up in the morning. But he did promise he wouldn’t walk away again. Michael might have tried to walk away from him, but he’s keeping his promise. For both himself and Kyle. He falls asleep in Michael’s arms, his breathy puffs against Alex’s neck, his hopes for tomorrow small, but very much there, alive in his beating heart.

\--------------

He wakes up the next morning still wrapped in Michael’s arms, safely held against his chest so he won’t fall out of the Airstreams tiny bed. It’s been a while since they’ve slept there, just as long since they’ve woken up just the two of them. It feels good, the way it always does to wake up in Michael’s arms, safe, warm, held like he’s something precious. It’s a heady feeling, and one he realizes now that he has been missing for a while, Michael has usually already been up and at them when he’s woken up for at least the last couple of months. 

Thinking back on it he can pinpoint exactly when it started happening; the night he and Kyle had started talking about them moving in together about two months ago. One thing led to another, and they had ended up in the bedroom together, so wrapped up in the pleasure that they hadn’t noticed Michael watching them. They had stopped when they did, pulling Michael into bed, undressing and caressing his everything but Michael had still been a bit distant the next day. Alex hadn’t thought much about it then, but it all comes to him clear as day now. How Michael has subtly been pulling back since that day, careful to try and leave Alex and Kyle to their alone time(they always come find him), or trying to leave so they can sleep next to each other in peace (they don’t let him leave). But he’s always been up early, citing work or Isobel and Max needing him.

Michael has been pulling away for months, and while they have noticed to some extent, they’ve never seen it for what it is; Michael thinking that he’s nothing to them but a bed warmer any more. And with Kyle panicking when Michael asked about it, well they have a lot to prove.

He reaches for his cellphone on the floor, and sends off a quick text, telling Kyle to come over to the Airstream with breakfast. Kyle replies with a thumbs up quickly, so Alex gets ready for the next thing on the agenda; waking Michael. He turns around as quickly and carefully on the too tiny bed, only to find Michael awake and staring at him.

“Hi. I didn’t think you were awake,” he says, his voice low in the small space between them. Michael doesn’t reply, just watches him, his eyes slightly narrowed against the morning sun creeping in through the blinds on the windows. “I texted Kyle, he’s on his way over with breakfast. I hope that’s okay.”

Michael still doesn’t answer, just continues to watch him. Alex doesn’t know what to do, so he just watches him back, listening out for Kyle’s car. He doesn’t know how much Michael remembers of their discussion yesterday, he if remembers at all, but he made a promise to make Michael let them show their love for him, and he’ll be damned if he doesn’t.

“Do you- do you remember anything from last night?” he asks. Michael gives him a miniscule nod but doesn’t elaborate as to what he remembers. Alex is afraid to ask what he remembers, just in case it comes with regret.

“Don’t worry. I said I would let you prove it, and I will,” Michael finally says, voice hoarse and groggy with sleep, as he closes his eyes and leans forward to rest his forehead against Alex’s on the pillow. They both stay there until they hear Kyle’s car driving into the junkyard, at which point they both get up and get dressed. Alex deliberately takes his time putting on the prosthetic so he can stay until Michael’s ready to go outside, a move Alex knows confuses him but he still does it. When they walk outside Kyle has stolen a table from the side of the Airstream and is setting up the table. Coffee, fresh bagels, cream cheese, lox, tomatoes and onions, fresh fruit, milkshakes from CrashDown and breakfast burritos. Things he knows Michael loves but hardly ever gets because of the cost.

“I uh- I got a bit of everything. I wanted to get your favorites, cause I really owe you an apology.”

“Valenti-”

“Michael, please, I’m so, so sorry. We’ve been planning on asking you if you wanted to live together for a couple of months, and I just got so wrapped up in planning a surprise party that when you made the comment yesterday I just panicked. I didn’t mean to jump down your throat like that, you didn’t deserve it.” The look on Kyle’s face is downtrodden, his eyes puffy as if he hasn’t slept through the night. Alex wouldn’t be surprised if he didn’t.

“I thought you both didn’t want me any more.” The shock on Kyle’s face would be funny if the situation wasn’t what it is.

“Wh-Ho- Whatever gave you that impression?”

“I came to the cabin two months ago. You were going to hard at it that you didn’t notice me, and after that you just seemed. Secretive. Like you only wanted each other.” Alex can’t help but be proud that Michael is actually talking about it instead of just burying it deep and getting defensive, it just proves that they have gotten somewhere.

“Two months ago? That night we first started talking about living together?” Kyle asks, looking at Alex who confirms it with a nod. “Sweetheart, we were excited. We didn’t mean to ignore you, and us just wanting each other is bullshit.”

Kyle walks over and runs his hands through Michael’s curls, resting them against his neck after. “There’s no way we would do this without you, it’s the three of us against Roswell, remember?”

Michael huffs out a laugh, leaning to rest his forehead against Kyle’s the way he did to Alex not long ago. “Kyle-”

“We love you. There’s three keys in my back pocket that proves it, one with an A, one with a K, and one with an M. We figured we would get you to move into the cabin with us, maybe get another dog, before we started talking about marriage.”

Michael pulls back so fast that Kyle almost topples over. “ _Marriage_?”

“Well yeah, in the future, sure,” Kyle says, smiling sweetly. “But as I said, moving in, maybe another dog first.”

Alex just looks at them, his boyfriends, as they lean against each other. Michael squeaking in the face of marriage, while Kyle is still talking about the moving in and the new dog. He doesn’t know for sure, but he has a feeling that it’ll work itself out.

“Hey, are you coming over here to give us both a kiss or are you just gonna stand there googly eyed and watch?”

On second thought, there is no feeling. It will work itself out.


	15. Liz

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The sadness is unwavering. She misses Max with a fierceness she hasn’t felt since… Rosa. Since ten years ago, when she lost her sister, her best friend, her most infuriating person. And now Rosa’s back, her sister ten years out of time, still as infuriating, if a bit tamer thus far. 
> 
> But her new person, the man she might truly love, is gone. Dead, bringing back her first person. Because he loved her.
> 
> It’s too much on a good day, too little on bad ones.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Prompt by Gracie (sp-ac-ep-re-si-de-nt (TheQueenOfStars) on Ao3 / sp-ac-ep-re-si-de-nt on tumblr)  
> Ok so I was thinking that I’ve read several fics where Liz is unwaveringly supportive of Maria and her having a relationship with Michael and so I just really want a fic where Liz tells Maria it was wrong of her to kiss Michael again without talking to Alex again and that she really hurt alex. It would also be nice if someone told Maria it wasn’t cool to out Michael to Liz. 
> 
> I hope you like it!

The sadness is unwavering. She misses Max with a fierceness she hasn’t felt since… Rosa. Since ten years ago, when she lost her sister, her best friend, her most infuriating person. And now Rosa’s back, her sister ten years out of time, still as infuriating, if a bit tamer thus far. 

But her new person, the man she might truly love, is gone. Dead, bringing back her first person. Because he loved her.

It’s too much on a good day, too little on bad ones. 

She needs him back, works night and day with Michael and Isobel to help them strengthen their power so they can resurrect their brother, in between working at the Crashdown, helping Rosa come to terms with everything about the future, and making sure Arturo doesn’t blurt out that his daughter is back from the dead. 

What she doesn’t have time for, is whatever is going on between Michael, Maria and Alex. She loves them all, adores the ground they walk on. But the mess they have made is one she wishes they would fix. She needs them, she needs Michael in the lab, she needs Alex behind the computers bringing Rosaline, the cousin, back to life, she needs Maria to help Rosa when she can’t. She needs her friends, Rosa needs her friends, and they need each other. All of them. Her and Rosa and Michael and Isobel and Alex and Kyle and Maria. 

But Michael is so distraught and lost in between it all, Maria is trying to keep up morale the way she always had but can’t and Alex. Alex is so hurt, even if he pretends he’s fine and he’s okay with whatever goes on with his ex-... His Michael and his best friend.

“Why did you kiss him?” She doesn’t mean to ask, but it just slips. She’s so, so tired today, missing Max with every fiber of her being, wishing that she could have her two best friends and her sister close. But right now, she can’t. 

“What?”

“I told you needed to talk to Alex. You really hurt him, Maria.”

Maria looks down into the bar she’s slowly wiping down, the way she’s been wiping it for 15 minutes in between stealing glances at Michael. Michael who’s sitting in a booth, staring soulfully into a glass of whiskey Liz knows contains acetone as well. But unlike other nights where Michael would drink it down, he’s just staring into it. When he’s not stealing glances at Alex and Rosa playing pool. Alex, who steals glances back whenever Michael isn’t looking, hurt in his eyes as he then turns his gaze on Maria

“You told me having feelings for him was okay too, remember?”

Liz catches Maria’s hand, holding it tight even as Maria doesn’t look up at her. “And it is. But you also told me Michael is Alex’s museum guy. His _museum_ guy, Maria. The only guy Alex has ever told us about. The only guy Alex could ever consider staying in Roswell for.” She looks at Michael again. “I understand having feelings for him. But I don’t understand why you didn’t speak to Alex first.”

“Maybe I shouldn’t have to get permission to like a guy, Liz.”

“No, of course not. But you wouldn’t do it to me.”

It strikes a chord in Maria, one so visible that Liz can feel her freeze, see the guilt and pain tumbling around inside of her. It’s a visceral reaction, one that despite Liz’s want to have them all back together again, makes her feel the slightest bit happy. Because no, Maria wouldn’t do that to her.

“What’s up with you, DeLuca? Outing my brother again?”

“I didn’t-”

“Yes, you did,” Isobel interrupts. “Maybe you didn’t think about it, maybe you didn’t mean to, but you still told someone he was bi without his permission. That’s outing someone.”

“I didn’t do it on purpose!”

“I know, you’re screaming with guilt over that too. But it still isn’t okay.”

Maria swallows, and Liz squeezes her hand. She’s happy when she feels a squeeze back. “Yeah. It wasn’t my place to tell.”

To Liz’s surprise, Isobel smiles. A slight smile, one that’s barely there before it disappears again. She nods before she leaves them to go sit down across from Michael. Liz watches her, a rush of affection she never expected to feel for Isobel Evans running through her. When she turns her gaze back at Maria, she’s surprised to see the same affection on Maria’s face. She doesn’t know when that happened, but she does know that Rosa had a sit-down conversation with both Isobel and Maria that she’s not in any way privy to. 

But that affection quickly turns back into guilt as her gaze turns back to Alex, before it swings back down. Liz doesn’t know what to say to make things better though she knows the only way it can be is for Maria to actually talk to Alex. 

“You need to talk to him, Maria. Before you destroy any chance of your friendship over a guy.”

“You mean before I destroy our friendship over what may be the love of his life.”

Liz doesn’t reply. She doesn’t need to. She knows Maria feels guilty enough, feels bad enough that she hasn’t talked to Alex. 

“You’re right. I wouldn’t do it to you. And some part of me really wish I hadn’t done it to Alex. But I really can’t help if I like Guerin, either.”

Liz shrugs. “No, you can’t help your feelings. But you can help your actions. You never should have considered starting anything with Michael before you talked to Alex. Both of you.”

She ducks her head, catching Maria’s eyes and sends her the tiniest of smiles. “Talk to him, before you do anything else. Don’t ask him to be happy for you, he doesn’t deserve that. Just talk, please?”

Maria’s eyes turn to Michael, and Liz watches her watch him for a minute before her gaze swings back over to Alex. She can see the emotions flitting in Maria’s eyes, guilt, sadness, love, and lastly determination. 

“I don’t want to lose either of them.”

“I know. But you will, if you don’t do anything. Maybe even both.”

Maria looks back at her, her eyes back to being filled with sadness. She doesn’t say anything, but she nods, lifting Liz’s hand up to her lips, pressing a short kiss to her knuckles in a gesture of gratitude Liz hadn’t seen Maria do since High School. Since long before Rosa died. 

“Thank you.”

She didn’t need to ask what Maria meant. Maria did always appreciate honesty above anything else. 

“De nada.”


	16. Soumate AU prompt 14

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fars is dusty. That was the first though that entered Alex’s head as they got there, it’s still the thought in his head. But it’s also (mostly) peaceful, the people of the province having no issue with American soldiers milling about as they gather their intelligence. Parts of Alex feels guilty that they’re away from Iraq and war sites. Part of him doesn’t.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> alltheheartseyes gave me Soulmate AU prompt: 14. Whatever song your soulmate is listening to is stuck in your head. For Malex please

Fars is dusty. That was the first though that entered Alex’s head as they got there, it’s still the thought in his head. But it’s also (mostly) peaceful, the people of the province having no issue with American soldiers milling about as they gather their intelligence. Parts of Alex feels guilty that they’re away from Iraq and war sites. Part of him doesn’t.

They’re only about 20 soldiers, officially sent to Fars to meet an informant. Unofficially the General thinks Alex has been working too much and needs to relax for a few days. So they are, hanging around in Kazerun with some friendlies while they wait for their informant to contact them. It’s quiet, it’s easy, it’s beer and good food and easy banter. It’s laughter.

Alex can’t remember the last time he laughed.

He’s having a good time. When a song comes on in his head. Oh fuck no.

“Huh? What’s up Manes?”

It takes him a minute to realize he’s spoken out loud, and the four-man squad he’s with (his squad) has all turned to look at him.

_Here we go, gettin’ smooth to the groove_

“Nothing, don’t worry about it.”

_Watching lovely ladies, how I sooth as I move_

“Something is obviously up, you don’t just curse for no reason.”

He sighs, looking at the concerned faces of his squad. “Any of you have a soulmate?”

Rodriguez lets out a laugh, a deep guttural laugh that tells Alex that he knows exactly what he’s talking about.

“Oh no. What song?”

He turns to Fallere, grimacing at his curious gaze.

“Mr. President. Coco Jambo.”

_Ayyayaya coco jambo ayyayai, ayye yo_

He can’t help but chuckle as his squad all starts laughing, the joy in their laugh infectious. He’s glad they get a laugh at his expense, in the middle of a year long deployment. He’s still gonna kill Michael.


	17. Soumate AU prompt 5, 8, 19

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> All prompted by @hannah_writes
> 
> 5\. There’s a clock on your wrist that counts down until you meet them.
> 
> 8\. You can’t see the colour of your soulmate’s eyes until you meet them.
> 
> 19\. There are tick marks on your dominant arm. Red marks represent how many people you’ve fallen in love with. These marks turn black if the person has died. You gain a white tick mark when you’ve met your soulmate, and it turns golden when you’ve fallen in love with them.

**5\. There’s a clock on your wrist that counts down until you meet them.**

The clock first appeared when Alex was seven. _6y 4h 31min_. It freaked him out, wondering if he would meat his soulmate when they were 6 and he was 13. He hoped not.

He watched the clock with interest, and fear, as he grew older. Figuring out that he preferred boys scared him, his hope for his soulmate to be a boy even more so. He knew his dad would kill him if he was.

He wakes up the day of the meeting, nervous and shaking. _1h 34min 20s..19s..18s._ It’s nerve wracking, nauseating. Thrilling. He goes to school with a nervous energy, being met by Maria and Liz who knows today is the day, by Max and Isobel who doesn’t know but seem weirdly excited for some reason.

Isobel yells, running forward and throwing herself around the neck of a guy walking into the school yard, wild curls and a lovely face. Their eyes meet as he walks forward, and Alex just knows.

_5s..4s..3s..2s..1s..0s_ “Hi, I’m Michael.”

“Hi. I’m Alex.“

It’s him.

**8\. You can’t see the colour of your soulmate’s eyes until you meet them.**

Gray. That’s what he sees in. Grayscales, black and white. It’s a boring life, it almost cost him his internship. Doctors who only sees in gray aren’t as good, they told him.

He proved they were wrong.

He learns to differentiate by touch, by feel, in the operating room. Learnt to use colors by the help of people who are blind. People who’ve lost their soulmates.

Sometimes it still stings when he was with Liz that she could see colors and he couldn’t. Sometimes it didn’t, because if Maxwell Evans knew that Liz was his soulmate, maybe he should have acted on it. He didn’t, so Kyle did. He still doesn’t regret it to this day.

But he still gasps loudly, the second he first sees color. Sees green. Then blonde, lit up by the sun in a lovely ponytail. The beige/grey of her shirt, and the brown tones of her pants. She’s the most beautiful thing he has ever seen. Especially when she frowns and tells him to not get any ideas, or she will shoot him.

**19\. There are tick marks on your dominant arm. Red marks represent how many people you’ve fallen in love with. These marks turn black if the person has died. You gain a white tick mark when you’ve met your soulmate, and it turns golden when you’ve fallen in love with them.**

Her white mark appears on her arm when she was 7, after she first met the new boy in class; Max Evans. It turns golden when she’s 15.

She knows she’s in love with him, knows he’s someone she’s intrigued by. But Rosa scoffs at her, tells her that she can’t just go crawling to her soulmate at first sight, she has to live first. So she does.

She gains a red mark with Kyle Valenti, falling easily in love with his charm and sweet love.

The golden mark turns white again, fours years after Rosa died. She finally managed to fall out of love with Max. She hates herself for it. But she’s thankful.

She never gained a red mark with Diego, but pretended for his sake that the red mark for Kyle belonged to him.

She doesn’t talk about the black mark, Thomas, her first boyfriend after she left Roswell. She still has a scar from the car accident on her lower foot. She tells people she got it when she took a drunk tumble.

She comes back to Roswell, and sees Max again. Sees the golden mark on his wrist. She hides the white one on her shoulder.

She talks to Rosa’s grave as her mark turns gold again. Smiles, happiness shining bright on her face.

Her breath stutters in her chest, as she watches the golden mark turn black.


	18. Soulmate AU prompt 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _Fuck you and the high horse you rode in on._
> 
> Quite frankly he doesn’t mind the rude words tattooed on the inside of his right thigh. They’re interesting, makes him wonder what he does to piss off his soulmate so badly on their first meeting. He showed them to Isobel once, she laughed and told him it seemed on point for him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Prompted by @spaceskam 
> 
> 9\. The first words your soulmate says to you are tattooed somewhere on your body. 
> 
> In which i accidentally au'd off of my vigilante!au

_Fuck you and the high horse you rode in on._

Quite frankly he doesn’t mind the rude words tattooed on the inside of his right thigh. They’re interesting, makes him wonder what he does to piss off his soulmate so badly on their first meeting. He showed them to Isobel once, she laughed and told him it seemed on point for him.

She’s not wrong.

He has a knack for attracting trouble, a knack for pissing people off until they either hit him or kiss him. He prefers the kissing (gender not an issue) but he will return the hit too. Maybe that’s why he’s such a good *cough* vigilante.

He tries at least, bumbling around as he does in his cowboy get up, his beloved black hat on his head. He does okay too, stopping some robberies here, helping people out of a fire there, winking, flirting, and generally annoying himself out of tight spots.

It’s what he does.

What he doesn’t expect is for Vigilante Reporter Always-Gets-The-Story Alex Manes to come storming into the Wild Pony (not-so-secret-vigilante hang out and bar) and straight up to him, showing a news paper in his hand. It’s tomorrow’s print, _THE COWBOY DOES IT AGAIN_ the headline, by Alex Manes.

He looks at Alex in confusion. Firstly, how the hell does he know who Michael is, secondly, what has he done now.

“Darlin’, I seem to have pissed you off but I don’t know why. Care to enlighten me?“

Alex’s eyes widen the tiniest fraction, before he snorts angrily, his lips pursing.

“Fuck you and the high horse you rode in on.”

Michael’s mouth drops open in shock, as he stares at the youngest Manes man, who’s nostrils are now flaring in obvious annoyance.

“Of course it’s him. Only you would attract the youngest son of Jesse Manes.“ He turns to his sister, who’s watching them with a wicked grin on her face, her own soulmate and owner of the Pony, Maria, desperately trying to hide a laugh behind the bar.

“Cowboy.“

Michael turns back to Alex again. mouth snapping shut at the fury on his face.

“If you ever try to annoy me into writing a story about you again, I’ll break your leg. And while we’re at it, stop making stupid mistakes. Even I could’ve done a better job today.“

And with that Alex Manes turnes and strides out of the bar. Michael can only watch him go, as Maria loses the battle with her laughter, Isobel cackling as she repeats _Only you_ over and over again.

He looks down at the news paper, and wrinkles his nose. Maybe he shouldn’t have left all those notes around Alex’s office to make him notice him.

But as he reads the article, he notices a tiny comment written in pen at the bottom. It’s a phone number.

He smiles. Maybe Alex didn’t mind the notes that much anyway.


	19. Bomb

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Alex!”
> 
> Alex closes his eyes. He doesn’t want to hear Michael’s voice, now. Doesn’t want to hear any of their voices, but especially his.
> 
> “Alex, please! Don’t do this!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This story is NOT a happy one, so DO NOT read it if that makes you feel bad. That being said, hello, welcome to my angsty brain.

“Alex!”

Alex closes his eyes. He doesn’t want to hear Michael’s voice, now. Doesn’t want to hear any of their voices, but especially his.

“Alex, please! Don’t do this!”

He doesn’t understand why Michael’s voice is so full of sorrow. He shouldn’t be sad, he’ll be free, now. The last Manes alive, gone. He’ll be free from the family that hurt his, that hurt his entire race. His voice shouldn’t be full of sorrow.

“Darlin’, please! Please Alex, answer me. Don’t do this, just answer me, please.”

He looks over at the bomb. All he has to do is activate it and it all ends. Project Shepherd dies, his family dies, he dies. He doesn’t want to die. But he will if it means saving them.

“Alex, if you activate that bomb you’ll die! You’ll be gone, forever! Please don’t, I don’t want you to!”

The words reflect around the fallout shelter he’s in, the tightly locked bunker mostly devoid of light and sound, besides the slight ticking of the bomb and the crackling of the radio in his hand. Michael isn’t supposed to be anywhere close to the radio he knows was in Kyle’s hands. He’s not supposed to be there and be scared.

“Fucking answer me, god damnit!”

“Did you steal the radio from Kyle?”

“What?” Michael asks incredulously. “That’s what you're worried about?”

“Well-“

“How about the fact that you’re locked in a fucking bomb shelter, huh? Does that worry you at all?”

“Not really, no,” he answers. He can hear the steady breathing exercises Michael does to stay calm. So he did listen, good.

“Alex. Please. Get your ass out of that shelter.”

“I can’t.”

“What the **hell** do you mean, can’t?”

“The bomb.” His gaze runs over it, once more like it has done with the fifteen minutes he’s been down there with it. “The timer is broken, or maybe it wasn’t there at all. It has to be started from down here or it won’t go off.”

“Well then, dismantle it.”

“It’ll still be a threat if I do. It needs to be blown up, Guerin.”

“But why does it have to be _you_?”

Alex stills. “Because I’m a Manes. My family started this, now I end it.”

He tunes out the profanities that leaves Michael’s mouth at that. He tunes out Michael telling him how he’s not to blame for the sins of his family. He tunes out Michael telling him that he doesn’t have to be a Manes, that he’s Michael’s family instead. Once upon a time that was true. But it’s not now.

“If I had asked you to go with me, to leave Roswell,” he interrupts. “Would you?”

The silence at the end of his question doesn’t hurt, any more. The first time he asked and Michael didn’t answer it did, but it doesn’t now. He gets it, understands better than anything else in his life. There’s so much sorrow, so much pain. But this he can do.

“I don’t blame you, Guerin. I know how hard it is.”

“Alex-”

“I wish I had the strength to go against my dad. Then maybe we would’ve been happy.”

“Alex, we can be happy **now**.”

He couches next to the bomb, finds the detonator button. He doesn’t need to acknowledge Michael’s words. He always was a miserable liar.

“Goodbye, Michael. I love you.”

“Alex, **no!** ”

He turns off the radio, watching as the timer continues to click down, his head conjuring images of Michael, of the few times they were actually happy and together.

_6...5…_

He feels good about it, now that he’s set out to do what he planned from the start. Now that he knows that they will all be safe.

_4...3…_

And now Michael can finally be

_2…1…_

**Free**

**_0_ **


	20. Bomb 2 (Where Alex survives)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “No!” Michael yells, his powers surging out of him faster than it’s ever done before. He screams as his powers speed along, surging out to find Alex, to wrap around him and keep him safe so he can show Alex how mich he doesn’t want him to die. So he can **show** him that they can be happy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a sequel to Bomb where Alex survives. Doesn't make it any happier though

“No!” Michael yells, his powers surging out of him faster than it’s ever done before. He screams as his powers speed along, surging out to find Alex, to wrap around him and keep him safe so he can show Alex how mich he doesn’t want him to die. So he can **show** him that they can be happy.

He feels his telekinesis find Alex, feels it wrap around him in a force so strong, feels the bomb blow hot and destructive against the walls. But he refuses to let Alex die, Alex Manes will **never** die for his father’s fucked up thoughts and ideals. Especially not on Michael’s watch.

“Alex!” He shouts into the radio, willing his powers to turn on the radio on the other side. “You better answer me!”

He doesn’t. Of course he doesn’t. Alex was willing to die for him, he’s not going to answer straight away.

“I have a massive amount of power wrapped around you right now, tell me if you’re alright.”

“I’m in the middle of it.” Alex answers. “The middle of an inferno with a shield of blue around me.”

“So you’re safe?!?”

“Michael. You shouldn’t have saved me. Now they’ll use me against you. They know now.”

He doesn’t have to ask who Alex means, he can’t let Alex go in the middle of an inferno and he can feel the military riding in on the edges of his powers. They’ll get to Alex before he does. It won’t end good, for either of them.

“I don’t care. You’re alive.”

Alex doesn’t reply. He knows why, can feel it in his bones how worried Alex is. How scared. Not for himself, never for himself. Always for Michael.

They breathe on either side of the radio, listening and feeling as the military comes closer. Alex was subordinate, and now he will pay for it.

“I love you, Alex.” Michael says just before they arrive. Alex doesn’t reply now either, just switches the radio off again. Alex might be afraid for Michael. But Michael is just as scared for Alex.

Especially when his powers fail as the inferno dies. And Alex gets dragged into the backseat of a car, and Michael can’t feel him any more.


	21. Bomb 3 (Where Alex doesn't survive)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The guilt consumes him, in the following weeks. The hate surges, the anger bursting out of him in intense screams. The grief makes him curl up and cry, nasty, hard tears that wrack his skinny frame and makes his stomach hurt.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Follows Bomb, and this is the one where Alex DOESN'T survive. So obviously not happy either

The guilt consumes him, in the following weeks. The hate surges, the anger bursting out of him in intense screams. The grief makes him curl up and cry, nasty, hard tears that wrack his skinny frame and makes his stomach hurt.

He eats when he has too, sleeps when he’s exhausted, drinks whiskey and acetone like it’s water. He’s spiraling, further than he did when Max died, further then when Isobel was in the pod. 

He lost his mom and that was the worst thing he had ever felt. He knows now that that wasn’t true. Losing Alex, watching the bomb blow up and knowing there was nothing he could do but watch is excrutiating.

He screamed, his powers surging out to look for Alex, searching the entire wrecked hole in the ground but they didn’t find anything. There was nothing left. Only flames and dust, once again the legacy of the Manes name. Alex did what a Manes man would do, and finished the job. A different job than Jesse, but still the job. In a split second he hated Alex for it. In another he feelt the overwhelming guilt of a loved one spared.

He hasn’t cried yet, can’t cry. He doesn’t want to. Alex deserves better than his tears, he deserved to be saved and loved for the rest of his life. He won’t get to do that now, Michael won’t get to do it. He won’t be able to show Alex that they couldn’ve been happy. They were moving towards it, finally talking and building something from the ground up, after tearing down the walls they had built between each other. 

It’s lost in a ball of fire, now. Lost in the beautiful stubborness that is Alex Manes, lost in Alex’s belief that he had to fix whatever his father did. Lost in a man who loved Michael enough to die to make sure he was safe.

He knows now that Alex took all the plans for the bomb with him. They won’t ever be able to build a bomb like that again, with all their research for it burned with the thing itself. 

He wishes that were a comfort, he wishes he could know if Alex saw that as a comfort. If he hoped they would be free now.

He wishes he had gotten to respond. 

“I love you too.”


End file.
